Week 9+10 Laos

Now if you're anything like me, you will know very little about Laos. Heck, I didn't even know how to pronounce it before arriving! Laos is Thailand's pretty little sister; with luscious green mountains, more rivers than roads and waterfall landscapes you'd be proud to have as your desktop background. Also of interest is that 85% of the land is unmanaged forest and that the USA bombed it 250 000 times in the "Secret War".

Luang Prabang

If for no other reason than its name is fun to say, you should go here. It's a peculiar little town which is kind of like the love child of France and Asia. It's also a welcome change to be able to get something to eat that isn't either noodles with rice or rice with noodles (much as I enjoy Thai/Laos food).

 Quaint little night market just kicking off

Nous sommes en France? (excuse the poor French)

Getting here is a bit laborious. We arrived at the Huay Xai border crossing in the North, went through the routine process of being fleeced by immigration and then hastily searched for any means of transport away from the border. The options were: a quick boat (highly recommended by the travel guide if you fancy ending your life); a slow boat (taking two days) or an overnight VIP bus. Well! we thought, VIP doesn't sound too bad. 

We were wrong. It was genuinely the worst bus ride of my life. There was a chicken under my chair which clucked when I put my feet there. Meanwhile, two people behind me were vomiting violently and the speakers above were playing psychedelic Laos music at ear splitting volume. The roads were so bumpy I'm pretty sure I got air a few times.

When we arrived we clambered into an open top taxi (called a Sorngtuk, but not spelt like that). Moments later an ice cold bucket of water came from behind and soaked us. To say I was startled is an understatement. We had arrived during the week long New Year's festival (Pii Mai), where everyone throws water at each other. Something to do with spiritual cleansing (and having fun). Apparently the Laos people think I need a lot of spiritual cleansing. Thailand have a similar thing called Songkran.

Just accepting my fate - Pii Mai New Year's Festival

This mode of transport, whilst incredibly fun, made us the ultimate water bomb targets

Luang Prabang has some of the most beautiful scenery I think I have seen on my trip so far. Here are a few of my favourite snaps.

Kuang Si Waterfall - this place rocks!

The dodgiest boat ride you will ever take - to Pakou Caves

It's the bear necessities, the simple bear necessities...

Another shot of Kuang Si falls because I like it so much

Pakou Caves - there are hundreds of Buddah statues in there

Having fun at, you guessed it, Kuang Si falls

Vang Vieng
Next up is Vang Vieng, a charming little tourist location where tubing is the main order of the day. We were especially lucky to arrive during the New Year's celebrations, which added an incredible atmosphere to the experience. The locals are amongst the friendliest people you will ever meet and were plying us with free drinks along the entire 4km stretch of the Mekong River. Albeit at times the drink was a cocktail of beer, ice and river water.

Tubes up!

 

Sabaidee Pii Mai! (Happy New Year's!)

 

Karst your eyes on these beauties (My puns get worse every week. I'm certain of it)

 

More dark holes in the Earth - Phu Kham Caves

Vientiane

The capital of Laos and also the most boring place I have visited so far. It feels like being in England, but with more mosquitoes. This sentiment was proved especially true when it started raining (this being the first real rain I've seen on my travels so far).

If you find yourself in this place for logistics reasons, do as we did and hit up the bowling/snooker club for the evening.

Tha Khek

Again, another place we didn't really want to go to. We booked a local bus to "Kong Lor Cave" and ended up overshooting our destination by 200km to this barren location. Still, at great cost we were able to charter a tour to go see the caves from here anyway.

For obvious reasons this is the best shot I can give you of Kong Lor Cave

Kong Lor Cave is well worth a visit. It's a 7km long natural tunnel through the limestone mountains. As you can see, the bottom is flooded, making a guided motor boat a necessity. Your guides will take you, at uncomfortably high speeds, through the darkness. It is perhaps the spookiest thing I have done, with visions of Harry Potter springing to mind.

Relieved to be back in the light

Another unfortunate thing about Tha Khek is getting out of it. The daily bus to Hanoi turned up 8 hours late. Still, I wouldn't have minded, except it was full. I then had a split second decision: whether to chance waiting a few more hours for a bus to another Vietnam location several hundred miles from where I wanted to be. OR! Get the 7 hour bus back to Vientiane. I reluctantly went with the latter option.

I was "lucky" that upon arriving in Vientiane (for the 2nd time) that I was able to bribe a bus driver to let me on a "full" bus to Hanoi. This did mean another 22 hour bus ride without a seat though. Fortunately the Laos people were so friendly. They offered me a space on the floor with them, ordered me dinner and stopped the Vietnamese scamming me. I was less keen on them hugging my legs and putting their feet on my chest during the night.

Sleeping under the bus seats (Vientiane to Hanoi)

Trip Statistics

Places Visited: (5) Huay Xai, Luang Prabang, Vang Vieng, Vientiane, Tha Khek (just arrived in Hanoi)

Distance Covered (excluding ridiculous 7 hour detour): 1760km

Week 7+8 Northern Thailand

As I begin to craft this blog entry, I can tell it is going to be one of my favourites already. You see, despite my initial reluctance to drag my lazy butt off the paradisaical beaches of the south, I may just have had the best week ever. 

Now technically I hopped over to Ayutthaya and Sukhothai first, but I'm too darn excited to tell you about Chiang Mai and Pai, so that's where I'll begin.

Chiang Mai

Now Chiang Mai itself is a pleasant enough place, but the sight-seeing is limited. It's unique selling point being that the city center is surrounded by a large, ugly wall and a slightly more aesthetic moat. It has a number of cool Wats (Buddhist temples) to take in, but quite frankly I'm a 40 Wat type of guy and Thailand has tried to plug a 100 Wat bulb in. There are just so many of them! Still, I can tell you're itching to see one, so here you go...

Clearly doing their best not to be photographed - but I got 'em!

The really cool thing about Chiang Mai is that it has an abundance of adventure activities you can do just outside of it. Prices are fairly decent and if you have my expert negotiation skills you can perhaps get a discount too. To be fair though, negotiation has never been easier. We found a three day trek through the jungle that we wanted to do. I asked for a 20% discount. The salesman paused a moment and then said "how about I give you a 25% discount because I want you to have a good time". Thai people really are just that nice.

The trek was insanely fun. It started with an elephant ride down an impossibly steep incline. I had no idea elephants were so sure footed. For those of you who haven't had the pleasure of riding an elephant before; it's kind of like sitting on a giant sweaty, prickly pin cushion that punches you in the butt with every step. I couldn't stop laughing as I was jostled side to side through the trees - until of course, one whacked me.

For those of you looking for a more comfortable ride - sit in the basket!

Then it was bath time. An extremely perilous activity where my naughty elephant pooped in the water and then sprayed it in my face. This was apparently quite hilarious to the guides.

It's an elephant's life isn't it?

After bath time, it was time for a quick snack of several hundred bananas

We said our sad goodbyes to the elephants and started our trek through the jungle. Our guides would stop occasionally and show us interesting things. I chewed on some cinnamon bark, rubbed my mosquito bites with tiger balm bark and drank water from vines he cut down. 

I claim this as Tye Land!

We stayed in one of the hill tribe villages for the night which was interesting/ uncomfortable. We were the only tourists around. Intermittently you would hear someone in the group shout obscenities as they discovered some horrendous insect on them. My favourite moment was when I noticed a luminous beetle on my friend David and shouted "AHH! what the frick is that?!" I then followed it with "Ok Dave, don't freak out, but..." That was as far as I got before Dave freaked out.

Traditional village life, there you see a traditional village mobile phone

I caught a rat for dinner - mercifully we never got round to eating it

This was hanging just outside the entrance to our doorless/windowless room for the night

A spot of authentic jungle lunch

During the evening our guide would entertain us around a camp fire, although I'm not sure that was his intention. He gave me a bamboo mug of "Jungle juice" to try. This was actually rice whiskey brewed in the village (a.k.a moonshine) and made me cough and splutter. My guide shrieked with delight "It like whiskey, same same, but different.....WAAHHH". He was also fond of saying "Oh my Buddah, Jungle Joe like moonshine". Unfortunately he liked it a little too much and the next day was so hung over that he tried to cancel our 2nd day of trekking. Eventually we got 4 hours trekking out of him.

Honestly the most uncomfortable night of my life. At 4.30am it sounded like Old McDonald's farm.

Doing some bamboo rafting

This may have been the scariest thing I've ever done

 Upon returning from our trek we wasted no time in booking ourselves on to "Flight of the Gibbon" - a zip line activity through the jungle. It was apparently voted Thailand's best tourist attraction. My guide put on a huge show when I came flying into him and hit him square in the gibbons.

In the jungle, the mighty jungle...

So this is a gibbon - somewhat reminds me of my sister and nephew

Pai

After Chiang Mai we visited Pai. I cannot express how much I have loved Pai. It's this really chilled out, picturesque town tucked away in the rolling mountains. Waterfalls and hot springs dot the land. I was also really grateful to finally have the temperature drop below a billion for a few days.

Our little travel party rented scooters and whizzed around the area. I must admit I was really nervous at first to ride a scooter; the last time I did, I crashed severely injuring myself. It wasn't long however before I felt completely at ease and confident enough to reach the dizzying speed of 80km/h on the good roads.

 

My favourite waterfall (yes I'm wearing the same vest in every photo)

And this is why it was my favourite... we literally did this for about an hour.

 

Life of Pai - (Pai Canyon)

Me on my 0.1 elephant power scooter

Ayutthaya

I'm fairly ambivalent about Ayutthaya. The main activity here is renting a boat to go and visit the various Wats. You can take pictures of stuff where you're not really sure why its significant.

Big Buddha

 A river - (some photos are hard to caption)

Miscellaneous interesting things

Sukhothai

Sukhotai is very similar to Ayutthaya in that there is lots of old stuff to see (circa 13th century). It used to be the capital of Thailand (as did Ayutthaya at one point). It was a lot more fun that Ayutthaya, for one because the sight-seeing is more visually appealing and two, because you can ride a bicycle around the ruins.

 The main Wat in the Sukhothai ruins

 This view certainly didn't ruin my day

 Parked myself here for a bit of R&R

So that's Thailand! I've had the most incredible time here and would love to come back again some time. Unfortunately their silly visa rule means I need to exit the country (to Laos) tomorrow. I'm a tad nervous the bus gets me to the border crossing only one hour before my visa expires.

Trip Stats

Places Visited: 8 - Bangkok, Koh Phi Phi, Koh Tao, Koh Phang-an, Ayutthaya, Sukhothai, Chiang Mai, Pai

Distance Covered: 2600km